Get your last minute suggestions in for my new life campaign before noon tomorrow! The dart board of fate goes live at that point. I have 12 possible options right now for changing the direction of certain elements of my life. I’ll let you know the three winners this weekend. And no– I will not
I’m sitting in the waiting room of the Jeep service station, waiting for my car after an oil change. Yes, that’s right. I know how to party on my vacation days. Because I have rare uninterrupted time to write (and I’m not seething because I’ve stupidly locked myself out of my apartment), I thought I’d
I very rarely give people financial advice. However, for people who are very concerned about the financial upheaval we are currently facing, I give you the following helpful guide (forwarded to me by the brilliant DM): <!–[if IE]>http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/48e56b79b67161f2/4741e3c5156499a7/b87f092b/-cpid/ad7937946f2caec0 –>
Apparently, the solution to all the world’s problems does not rest with governments, personal responsibility, or me winning the lottery (I know, that last one was a shock to me, too). No, the solution to the world’s problems rests on penis enlargement and the ability to make those elongated members harder for days. Don’t believe
5:00amYou know the day is going to be special when you start it by locking yourself out of your apartment at 5:00am. That’s right. You heard me. 5:00am. They are doing work on the pipes today, and water is going to be shut off intermittently throughout the day. Being the intrepid, enterprising soul that I
Hey, I just deliver the news, I don’t make create it. http://news.aol.com/health/article/condom-ring-tone-is-a-hit-in-india/170688?icid=100214839x1209109714x1200558856 I’m picturing myself in a meeting. In this meeting, we’re discussing the complexities of strategic planning and the difficulties of doing that in a shaky economy. And then suddenly, I realize that I haven’t turned my phone off because my boss is now
Buying a tabloid in Los Angeles is sort of like buying porn in Ohio. You know it happens, you’ve heard about it happening, but no one admits to doing it. And if they do admit to doing it, they are filled with shame and guilt. That was me on Thursday (the tabloid, not the porn),
Look, I don’t mean to be difficult, but… (Oh, wait. Yes, I do. I’m actually on a lifelong quest to strike the perfect balance between difficult and invisible. So far, I’ve only really managed to achieve invisible, but I can tell that the public is pulling for me to finally achieve my full potential.) Anyway.