My original post for something new today was a relatively humorous post about the new cider I had discovered during an unplanned happy hour celebration with friends. I may still post that later, but at the moment, I think you would be better served by learning how to make the most of a bomb threat. Don’t see the connection? You will.
It started innocently enough. I floated the idea of happy hour. There was rejoicing. I got there early and ordered up my round of fries and fabulous new cider and waited for the girls. Pen arrived. We congratulated each other on surviving another Monday. DM arrived. Well, actually, more like DM came in heralding the news that, at that very moment, police were blocking off all access points to the Beverly Glen/Santa Monica Blvd area (if you aren’t familiar with the area, this is an extremely busy access point for people entering/leaving Century City, particularly at rush hour). We all agreed it was weird, but took the news fairly well.
You know what else we took fairly well? Finding out that we were actually inside the caution taped area while the bomb squad checked for an explosive device. Yep. Welcome to my Monday night.
I’m not sure if it was the lack of information, or the fact that most of the activity seemed to be about a block away, but we set about making the best out of being trapped somewhere while police searched for a bomb (as you do). I learned a few things.
Bomb Threat Conclusions
- $3 happy hour special beer is fine for a normal day. But do you want it to be your last beer? Of course, the answer is no. In the face of an explosives search in the neighboring buildings, upgrade that alcohol. I’m not suggesting you go top shelf right away—check in to see how far down the street the disposal unit is and go from there.
- There is no such thing as a diet during a bomb threat. Bring on the “beer cheese fondue” and hot wings.
- When you ask a person of authority whether or not you should evacuate and they say, “I don’t know what your protocol is, ma’am”—think carefully about your response. Personally, my protocol is to avoid being in the vicinity of something that could explode. But that’s just me. Your protocol might look more like “The Hurt Locker.”
- This road closure during rush hour because of a potential explosive device doesn’t appear to have made the news– which makes one realize how often this probably happens. Pen confirmed this theory by telling me that when she worked downtown, they had threats all the time, and they never made the news. On the one hand, I agree that you shouldn’t give cranks any press. On the other hand, I hear about the Kardashians on a daily basis. Of the two, I feel like this situation might be more newsworthy (but, again, that’s just me).
- Strange men will want to hug you. Apparently, during an explosives sweep, I am not invisible. It’s the one exception to the rule. Always keep the bartender between you and the man who suggests that the best way to get through this is, “if we all huddle close together.” And kudos to the bartender for just saying, “Don’t even go there, man.”
Obviously, I’m making light of what was a serious situation. Given that they only evacuated the upper floors of our building and left us enjoying the reduced happy hour prices downstairs, we felt relatively safe where we were and could joke about the situation. I have no idea what came of the search, and the whole thing lasted less than two hours. Happily, it seems it was a false alarm, and everyone walked away.
And that’s how happy hour became an unexpectedly unique, new experience.