Hit? Or No Hit?

Because I’ve been sidelined for so long in the dating game, I’m not always good at gauging whether or not someone is actually hitting on me. So, since I’ve got several hours of sitting here at the DMV, I thought we should all play a game I like to call “hit, or no hit”.

It’s either this, or killing the woman sitting next to me testing ALL of her freakin’ ring tones at full blast. So, play along, you are saving a life 😉

1. A guy sitting next to me and a friend at lunch, wandered into our conversation. As he was leaving, he handed me his card and said if I ever needed financial planning, to give him a call.

Hit, or no hit?

I said no, Julie said yes. My reasoning– he’s probably always selling because he’s on commission, plus since when is “financial planning” euphemistic for “want to date”?

2. There is a guy standing near me right now who keeps looking at my flipflops. Really intently looking. Kinda creepy, actually.

Hit, or no hit?

I say no. I think he’s contemplating stealing them. Come to think of it, he’d probably look better in them than I do. Either that, or he has a toe fetish. That’s right, buddy, I’m writing about you.

3. A male friend said “we should see a movie some time”.

Hit, or no hit?

I think this one has to be situational. I was so thrown, I blurted out “you mean like a date?” Which then threw him into saying “uh, well, I guess if you wan…” to which I yelled out “NO!!!!!” Yep, smooth, that’s me.

4. You want to go for a walk?

Hit, or no hit?

Again, situational for me. Most of the time I would assume not a hit. Could be that he’s just trying to take you somewhere secluded to kill you. I try to approach these invitations with caution.

5. A guy grabs your ass and yells “want to F***???”, but is completely wasted. Hmmm still ambiguous for me.

6. And finally, my favorite from today– “Hells, yeah, yur worth smacking to. buuuu yaaaaaa.” Um… ok, not only do I not know if that’s a hit or not, but I don’t actually know what it means. It is, however, leaving me with a slightly icky feeling.

I think it is clear that I actually need some sort of formal courting system set up. There used to be a whole set of manners for this type of thing. I say, we need to go back to the day where a man declared his intentions formally–preferably on lovely parchment and ending with “my dearest, loveliest Kate”. Then after 6 weeks of notes (and one background check later), I would be better prepared to answer the “is he interested” question.

In the meantime, shoe fetish guy is lingering again.

Send me your own questionable hits, and we’ll let the group decide if someone was trying some romantic moves or not.

Kate, who needs a guy to girl dictionary before she is dating in LA

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *