Random Thought #1
Have you ever nearly taken out office-mates in a mad dash to see who could get the last ½ of a bagel that has been sitting in a box for 4 hours? There is something about free food, even leftovers, that makes individuals act like they’ve been stranded on an abandoned island without the luxury of doughy goodness. It’s not like we can’t all go downstairs and purchase food if we were really starving. But we don’t—not that I’m saying I was one of these people today (but I might have been). And I might have won because being short means you are actually able to be stealth in ways that people who aren’t invisible cannot imagine. [Please read that sentence over again with the Mission Impossible theme song running through your minds].
Random Thought #2
Ever spend the day listing to conversations which you then immediately insert into your nearly-google-like translator to get the subtext? If you haven’t, you should try it.
Text: “I was confused at first because very few people have my cell phone number.”
Subtext: “I had forgotten that I had given you my cell phone number that weekend. My wife was surprised, too.”
Yes, it is loads of fun for the whole family.
Random Thought #3
Change comes slowly. Awareness of change comes with the force of a sledgehammer.
Random Thought #4
It has taken over a week to finish that blog on procrastination—and for entirely obvious reasons, this amuses me.
Random Thought #5
Why is it that every time and opportunity presents itself to me, the following conversation (with only slight variation) occurs?
- Oh, that sounds like a lot of fun!
- I didn’t realize that it was at night.
- All the way out there?
- How long will it last?
- If I can’t go at the last minute, will you be able to get someone else to take the ticket?
- What if I have to leave?
- It’s not like I won’t get another chance to do it.
- Maybe next time.
I can’t decide if I’m talking myself out of risk, or if deep down I really don’t want to do these things anyway. After all, most activities involve other people—and I don’t like people.
Random Thought #6
Pen and Chloe added another piece of evidence to support their theory that I have a sign on my forehead that reads, “F**k off” and that only men can see it. On Sunday, to celebrate the illustrious birthday of Pen, therapist to the stars (if you count me as a star, of course), we attended a wine festival (not really a formal festival, but there was a tent, many winemakers and a lot of wine). In the process of taking in the sights, sounds and libations, we were greeted by an enthusiastic winemaker—who was very lovely, but a “kisser”. He was a very exuberant man, and insisted on kissing all the ladies on the cheek upon arrival at his station. His wine was wonderful. He was delightful. He had a European flair. He also had the good sense to leave me alone. Seriously, he went from DM to Chloe to Pen, but took one look at me, and clearly thought, “I don’t want to die here today”. His girlfriend kissed us all—yep, only men can read the sign.