Oh, Hollywood

I’ve started doing extra work (no, I won’t give you spoilers) to get some cash to help with my little adventure year (which has apparently been extended to 15 months).  While I have done this work periodically in the past, there was about a 10 year gap before I re-registered.  Naturally, this means that I had forgotten exactly how tricky this process can be.

The fact that I’m absurdly short is not a revelation, and I’m pretty realistic about my looks. But… in the last few days I’ve been nixed from shoots because I was not attractive enough (okay, I get that) and because my breasts were too big (um…). Yeah, that last one is not usually how these conversations go.   If someone had said “you’re old as ass,” I would have agreed with them and applauded their excellent reference to one of the best scenes in Knocked Up. This was a new one.  Hollywood… you confuse me so.

On the upside, the other day, I was given a husband and a child for the day.  They were delightful. I was tempted to take a photo with them on set and use it for holiday cards. It sparked off a whole new set of career ideas for me. Could I open a lifestyle casting service? You could literally hire a family for a few hours—you know, for annoying things like reunions or company picnics. It would be like The Joneses only your fake family would be marketing you instead of marketing products.  I think this is genius. I’ll be writing up the proposal (and the script) right now. One of them is bound to hit.


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