The Set Up

Source: HelloKids.com

This weekend at the Calabasas Pumpkin Festival, my lovely, normally sane, friend asked me if it would be okay if she gave my phone number to her friend (who I had jokingly been calling my boyfriend for six months since he had been unavailable and unthreatening… unlike now). I can only assume that the pumpkin beer was particularly potent that day. But I’ll have you know that I reacted in the way that any mature, single woman would in this situation. I stared at her in consternation as the following thoughts raced through my brain:

“What? No.”

“Dive! Dive! Dive!”

“I wish I hadn’t had that pumpkin pie for breakfast.”

“hmmm pie.”

“Focus.”

“If I hide under the table they won’t see me.”

“Has he always had a longing for a female version of Niles Crane?”

“Dive! Dive! Dive!”

I’m guessing this is not the normal reaction when someone offers to facilitate a meeting with a man. But honestly, how does this work? I’m terrible at talking to strangers on the phone with whom conversation is required. How does casual conversation work with some man I’ve never met?

Email could be a possibility. Facebook has proven useful; though communicating through Facebook means that one security change and all of our fumbling attempts at witty repartee will be exposed to my timeline. I thought a completely planned yet seemingly accidental meeting was the way to go.  Alas, six months ago when our blind date was very nearly a reality, he was informed of the planned introduction. So… it’s unlikely that I could pretend otherwise and not seem crazier than I am.

If you were in my position, what would be your preference for making this introduction happen?

10 comments on “The Set Up”

  1. Danielle Reply

    Please, if he has your number, he’s not going to call; he’s going to *text*. So you’re safe from verbal convo for awhile 😉

  2. Danielle Reply

    Please, if he has your number, he’s not going to call; he’s going to *text*. So you’re safe from verbal convo for awhile 😉

  3. Helen Reply

    What do you have to lose? Even if the conversation is awkward and haulting and leads to nothing? Does it really matter? You don’t know him. If he thinks poorly of you, it will not affect your life in any way. I know there is a fantasy that you would be consumed with shame, but seriously, you don’t know this person. His opinion of you is irrelevent. On the other hand, if you have a great conversation, you may at the very least make a new friend. This is a very low risk situation. Thre is potential for gain if it goes well, but you don’t actually lose anything even if it is a nightmare.

  4. Helen Reply

    What do you have to lose? Even if the conversation is awkward and haulting and leads to nothing? Does it really matter? You don’t know him. If he thinks poorly of you, it will not affect your life in any way. I know there is a fantasy that you would be consumed with shame, but seriously, you don’t know this person. His opinion of you is irrelevent. On the other hand, if you have a great conversation, you may at the very least make a new friend. This is a very low risk situation. Thre is potential for gain if it goes well, but you don’t actually lose anything even if it is a nightmare.

  5. Helen Reply

    I have to type over the Enter your comment here in the reply box which doesn’t go away…so I cannot tell when I’ve made a typo. FORTUNE favors the bold. LOL.

  6. Helen Reply

    I have to type over the Enter your comment here in the reply box which doesn’t go away…so I cannot tell when I’ve made a typo. FORTUNE favors the bold. LOL.

  7. Dee Murray Reply

    you should totally do a “mutual friend Happy Hour” where your normal, sane friend could introduce you (NOT in a Bridget Jones, paddling pool way) and could pick up any awkward lags in conversation until she excuses herself to the loo & crawls out the back window once she sees that you two are getting on famously. Does he like sports? pick Monday/Thursday/Sunday night football…NBA? Laker night! NHL? too bad they’re on hiatus. Ah, well. Lawn Bowling? Women’s Curling? ESPN 8 “The Ocho” (for all you Dodgeball fans out there!) And the easy, reliable: trading embarrassing stories about your friend! It’s just a glass of wine, and if isn’t working out for you, you spontaneously have to run to the Rx before it closes to get some cream to clear up that nasty itch that won’t go away! tee hee!

  8. Dee Murray Reply

    you should totally do a “mutual friend Happy Hour” where your normal, sane friend could introduce you (NOT in a Bridget Jones, paddling pool way) and could pick up any awkward lags in conversation until she excuses herself to the loo & crawls out the back window once she sees that you two are getting on famously. Does he like sports? pick Monday/Thursday/Sunday night football…NBA? Laker night! NHL? too bad they’re on hiatus. Ah, well. Lawn Bowling? Women’s Curling? ESPN 8 “The Ocho” (for all you Dodgeball fans out there!) And the easy, reliable: trading embarrassing stories about your friend! It’s just a glass of wine, and if isn’t working out for you, you spontaneously have to run to the Rx before it closes to get some cream to clear up that nasty itch that won’t go away! tee hee!

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