Good Vibrations?

On this fine Friday, I give you the following question.  What is the strangest gift you’ve ever received—or the strangest way you’ve ever received a gift?  Mine works both ways.

As most of you who have been reading the blog know, I am a delicate flower.  I blush easily. There aren’t many ribald tales from my past. I shy away from highly descriptive sexual banter (most of the time).  So, it’s pretty easy to make me turn red even when I’m in on the joke.

As a party gag for my birthday, some friends decided that a gigantic, rubber, phallic type object would make an excellent party favor.  And I admit the idea does make me laugh.

But the idea took a turn.

My friend’s roommate, a guy I barely know, was hanging out with a friend of his (who I had never met prior to the party). They decided that they were going to get this gigantic, rubber phallus.  But when they got to the store, the helpful sales person suggested that they get me something that might end up being more “useful.”  So, taking her advice, they brought me something endlessly smaller… and bedazzled (bejeweled?).

Do you have any idea how strange it is to be presented with a small, purple, sparkly vibrator from two men you don’t know?

Also, I vaguely remember the male member, so I can’t be positive about this, but the apparatus did not resemble my hazy recollection. Naturally, that prompted my blurting out, “What is it?”  Do you have any idea how strange it is to have two men you don’t know explain what that type of device does?

Yeah.

So, needless to say, that counts as both the strangest gift ever given to me, and the strangest presentation.  Now it’s your turn. Go!

 

2 comments on “Good Vibrations?”

  1. Dee Murray

    There was the year that both my family and I were convinced that I was getting engaged…I was heading up to No. Cal. to Meet The Family for the First Time. We’d been dating four years. It was Christmas. And he “really wanted me to be with him this year”. HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! It’s COMING!!!!! We went to the mall Christmas Eve with his family to do some “last minute shopping” and he took off down the mall alone, saying that he had to “pick something up” & he’d be right back. Later that evening, before Midnight Mass, he asked me to come to his room to give me my gift before we left. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG – here it comes!!!!!! It was in a bigger box than I expected…but maybe that was to throw me off the scent. So I tore open the paper excitedly and I saw a box that on the outside said “pair of crystal candlesticks”. So I got really excited and tore open THAT box. Which inside contained…wait for it…crystal candlesticks. Yep. I felt like Jennifer Aniston in Bruce Almighty at that moment – extremely foolish and disappointed. And he saw it and wondered what was wrong…he knew how much I loved candles and he thought I’d love these. The rest of my gift was the flight up and spending Christmas together….yeah. After all that build up. Candlesticks. Which I still have to this day. So there is that, I guess. It isn’t exactly strange, except when you think you’re getting engaged and you get something to stick wax in and light on fire.

  2. Dee Murray

    There was the year that both my family and I were convinced that I was getting engaged…I was heading up to No. Cal. to Meet The Family for the First Time. We’d been dating four years. It was Christmas. And he “really wanted me to be with him this year”. HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! It’s COMING!!!!! We went to the mall Christmas Eve with his family to do some “last minute shopping” and he took off down the mall alone, saying that he had to “pick something up” & he’d be right back. Later that evening, before Midnight Mass, he asked me to come to his room to give me my gift before we left. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG – here it comes!!!!!! It was in a bigger box than I expected…but maybe that was to throw me off the scent. So I tore open the paper excitedly and I saw a box that on the outside said “pair of crystal candlesticks”. So I got really excited and tore open THAT box. Which inside contained…wait for it…crystal candlesticks. Yep. I felt like Jennifer Aniston in Bruce Almighty at that moment – extremely foolish and disappointed. And he saw it and wondered what was wrong…he knew how much I loved candles and he thought I’d love these. The rest of my gift was the flight up and spending Christmas together….yeah. After all that build up. Candlesticks. Which I still have to this day. So there is that, I guess. It isn’t exactly strange, except when you think you’re getting engaged and you get something to stick wax in and light on fire.

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